Finding the Runaway (Keepers of the Light Book 4) Read online

  “Jane, would you mind taking Leland back to your house for me today? I would really love to take a stroll down to Lookout Rock. I think it might help me clear my head.” The path to the lighthouse was rarely taken during work hours. That setting would offer her the best chance of having this conversation away from others.

  “Of course, dear. You take your time.” Jane gave her arm a warm squeeze and walked closer toward the school.

  Lilian waited until Jane was a few yards away before she made a jerking motion with her head, a signal for Levin to follow her.

  She then marched toward the lighthouse. Only once did she look over her shoulder to see if Levin had understood. He had.

  She was grateful he had the courtesy to wait until she had crossed the bridge before approaching her. In fact, she was walking just by the trail that led to the small beach where she had first met the Winfields when she felt his hand touch her elbow. She jerked away.

  “Well now, Muffin. Is that any way to greet your fiancé?”

  She didn’t slow down. Her eyes remained fixed ahead on her destination. That building was constructed to give ships that were caught in dangerous waters a chance of escaping unharmed. It was a symbol of hope, a gentle guiding light. Could it bring her the salvation it had offered so many sailors?

  “I see that encountering me has made you so overwhelmed by emotion, you are speechless.”

  She finally flicked her gaze in his direction. “I don’t mind speaking with you, Levin, but I would prefer to wait until we reach the lighthouse.”

  A crooked smile took hold of his features. “Sure. I’m in no rush. We have our entire lifetimes to talk.” He put his hands in his pockets and strolled alongside her, whistling a tune he knew she hated.

  They arrived at the end of the path in no time. As anticipated, it was deserted. Still, Lilian knew that being caught alone with this stranger in a place so removed from other people would result in gossip, something she dearly hoped to avoid. The best way to ensure this little visit went by unnoticed would be to stand on the west side of the bluff. In doing so, they would be hiding behind the structures and would remain unseen by those walking the trail or those who happened to glance up at the lighthouse from the mill or town.

  “Levin, the coastline here in Oregon is stunning. You can get a wonderful view of it on the other side of these buildings.”

  “That sounds lovely. Reuniting with my beloved has put me in a romantic mood. I can already imagine retelling this story to our grandchildren. The ocean will provide the perfect backdrop for our tale of reconciliation.”

  Lilian gritted her teeth but said nothing. She led him to the area she thought would best protect them from prying eyes.

  Levin looked around. “The view is nice, but I must point out, this is very secluded. Can I assume that absence has made your heart grow fonder? Have you missed me so much you hope to physically demonstrate your affection?”

  He took a step toward her. She took a step backward.

  “No. But I am glad you are here. I need to apologize. I acted very poorly at our last encounter. It was rash and childish.”

  His eyes twinkled with amusement. “You mean running away from me, down the aisle, in front of all of our friends, family, and acquaintances?”

  She blushed. “Yes. I am sorry about that. I handled that very badly.”

  He cleared his throat. The waved pounded against the rocky cliffs. He would need to speak louder than he normally would to make sure he could be heard. “I admit, I was very humiliated at first. And hurt. I thought you were rejecting me. But then I realized how ridiculous that sounded.” He puffed out his chest like a peacock and leaned back on his heels. Casting a glance in her direction, Lilian could see he wore the same smug expression he had been wearing when they had first met.

  “You and I both know we were meant to be together. You didn't run away because you were trying to escape from me. You ran away because you were scared. Scared of opening your heart — of allowing yourself to be happy.”

  Lilian wanted to scream. He was so sure of himself. But she had long since found that it was pointless to argue with a man who can't see beyond his own delusions.

  “You're right, Levin. And thank you. I am in love, and it's terrifying. It's so much bigger than me. It’s all-consuming. I can't escape it. At night I dream about it. And I have been a coward, hiding how I feel, waiting for some sign to just say it. But you are wrong about one thing. This love I feel… it isn't for you. I am in love with another man, and I can’t allow fear to hold me back. You have personally come all this way to find me, believing that I love you. You couldn't stand not knowing and needed to hear me tell you directly. You’ve shown me that, even if it's painful, I need to tell him. And for that, I will always be grateful.”

  “Do you mean to imply that in the brief time you have been here — here, in this provincial town — you have managed to fall out of love with me and have convinced yourself you are in love with some man — who you met here — in this town? I have met several of the people from this region in the past few days, Muffin. We were never meant to live in a place like this. We weren’t born to mingle with this crowd.”

  “Levin, you can scoff all you want, but I am not imagining my feelings. I am sorry you came all this way. I had hoped by fleeing, I could help you see you don’t need me. I am not the type of wife who could make you happy.”

  “But you are the woman whose name appeared beside mine in an engagement announcement that was posted in three newspapers. You are the woman half of Ohio expects me to marry and who the other half assumes I already have married. Happy or not, in love with another or not, you must marry me. How am I to become governor if the voters think I can't even manage to keep someone like you by my side?”

  She shrugged. Despite her efforts, she knew she had not successfully hidden her pity.

  Levin’s expression grew dark. “You understand that I can ruin your family. The business your grandfather worked so hard to create, the one your father has slaved away at for three decades, it is not impervious to failure. You love your family. You don't want to see them lose all they have worked so hard for, do you?”

  “Why are you trying to punish them for my mistakes?”

  “You can say I am punishing them, Lilian, but I say I am offering you an incentive. As Machiavelli pointed out, the ends justify the means. I know you will be better off by my side. The methods I use to help you make the right decision may seem hard at first, but you will reflect on this one day and thank me.”

  She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I love my family very much, and it is crushing me to know you intend to hurt them, but I can't live a lie. Now, if you will excuse me, there is something I must do.”

  She turned and walked away. She had nearly reached the path when she heard him call after her that he was staying at The Noble and she could find him there once she’d come to her senses.

  ***

  Bethany suggested that Hunter take a long lunch. He had been distracted all day and had made several mistakes. He had nearly sent the Tubman shipment to the Walters’ in Eugene and would have incorrectly tagged the premium cuts had Bethany not noticed. He told her he had a sleepless night. She recommended a long walk, saying it would help him focus.

  His feet carried him toward the lighthouse. He rarely made it out that way, but it was an inspirational setting, and he needed some inspiration. Besides, he knew the trail would provide the ideal locale to sort through his thoughts.

  A part of him wanted to believe she had amnesia. That would mean she hadn't been lying to him and wasn't in trouble. But if she really had lost her memories, she would be leaving them. That was a possibility he was not ready to face.

  A larger part of him was convinced she had known her name all along. But if this were the case, then she didn’t trust him. Such thoughts made him both sad and angry.

  Then, of course, there was the question of why she had lied. Was she running from something? Was she
just giving in to her impulsive nature and seeking adventure? Both alternatives were equally likely.

  He slowed as he passed by the trail which led down to the beach where he had first met her. She never had explained how she had ended up on a beach alone in the middle of the wilderness. That should have been his first clue not to allow himself to get too close.

  The purpose of this walk was to regain focus. Circling through the same questions over and over was not going to help him achieve this goal. He stood still and tried to absorb his surroundings. He breathed in the scent of salt air, the breeze tickled his skin, he heard the pounding of the sea and her voice. The voice of Lilian? He had to be hallucinating. Still, he hurried toward the lighthouse and did so quietly.

  Rather than fade away, she was joined by a man and the conversation grew stronger. He was just able to make out words when he understood he had come upon Lilian in the midst of a secret tryst.

  “You and I both know we were meant to be together…”

  It had to be the man who was searching for her. Hunter didn’t recognize his voice. It was not someone from the mill.

  “…You didn't run away because you were trying to escape from me. You ran away because you were scared. Scared of opening your heart of allowing yourself to be happy.”

  All doubts faded. This was definitely the man who had given Selene a flyer!

  “You're right, Levin. And thank you. I am in love, and it's terrifying. It's so much bigger than me. It’s all-consuming. I can't escape it…”

  He had heard enough. He had his answers. She had never forgotten her past; she had never cared about him; she wasn't in trouble. She had been overcome with her love for some other man and it scared her. She had come here, had toyed with his heart, and had lied. He ran down the path. He had never before felt so angry, but his anger was at himself. How could he have been so stupid? Why had he opened up his heart?

  Chapter 14

  Bethany was holding a clipboard, speaking to Jim, one of the operators, when Hunter rounded the corner. Their eyes met. She must have made some sort of excuse to Jim because when Hunter walked past her, she turned and followed.

  “Hunter! Did you enjoy your walk?” she called, her legs moving twice as fast as his as she tried to keep pace.

  “It was exactly what I needed,” he replied. He needed to know the truth, alright. He needed to wake up and stop trying to live his life as if it was some fairytale. He cursed himself again for being so blind.

  “Oh, I…I thought maybe you were a little… tense.”

  “I’ll be sure to stretch next time,” he said. He snatched a pair of leather gloves from a cubby. “Is there anything you needed, Miss Forester?”

  “No,” she said softly. She turned toward her office but paused. Looking back over her shoulder she said, “Troy and I have chosen the date for our wedding. It will be a week from next Saturday. We hope you and Emily will come join us.”

  “I can't speak for Miss Emily, but I wouldn’t think of missing it.”

  Bethany nodded. The faintest of smiles flashed before her face contorted with concern, and she walked to her office.

  Hunter pulled on his gloves. He wanted to do something that required exertion. He’d help the boys fishing the logs out of the river.

  “Hey,” he called.

  He turned in Jim’s direction to see if he’d been heard. But instead of seeing the operator, all he could see was Lilian. She was standing in the doorway, scanning the room. He assumed she had come for him.

  He knew why she was here. She wanted to tell him she was leaving and wouldn’t be there to watch Leland anymore. She probably made up some story to explain it.

  Does she even care enough about Leland to feel any guilt over the heartache she is going to put him through? I should just make this easy for her. There’s no use dragging this out.

  He walked over to her, passing the other man on the way.

  “Jim, I have a visitor. I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

  He took her by the arm and pulled her outside.

  No reason to give everyone a show.

  “Well, if it isn’t Lilian. It is Lilian today, isn’t it? You haven't decided to use your alias, have you?”

  “My alias?”

  She was so convincing. Those big round eyes. She looked like a confused child.

  “I know that Lilian is not your middle name. You have been lying to us about who you are and why you are here. And the lies started the very first moment we met.”

  He wanted to call her out on something. She had wounded him deeply. He hoped his words had cut her a little.

  “What…is that why you have been acting like this? Are you mad about my name?”

  “Why would I be mad you lied? You’re a Yankee. That’s what you do.”

  “I’m from Ohio. I never said I was from the South. You assumed I was Southern, and I just never corrected you. But you're right, I wasn't truthful about my name…at first… but I was trying to fix it.”

  “Is that what that was? Tell it to your fiancé, Lilian.” He spat out her name.

  “My what?”

  His anger grew. He clenched his fists. “Your fiancé. What is his name? I heard you just now on the bluffs by the lighthouse. What is the name of the man you were talking to?”

  “I was talking to Levin Sanford, But he’s not…”

  “Levin Sanford?” He couldn’t believe this. It just couldn't be. “The politician?” He had to clarify. It had to be a different man with the same name.

  “Yes.”

  Hunter laughed. Of course, he was losing her to Levin Sanford. “I might have known.” He shook his head. “But it doesn’t matter. I know why you came to Oregon. I know that you just needed a place to live. So, you lied to me. You manipulated us, so we would keep you safe. We… Leland loves you, but then again he doesn't even really know the real you.”

  “He does. You both do. I did lie, and I’m sorry, but I never pretended to be someone I wasn’t.”

  “You had plenty of time to confess. I told you up front that I was willing to help you — just because you needed a helping hand. But you didn't tell us the truth then. You're only doing so now because I caught you. And you let me believe you were from the south? That is a lie by omission.”

  “Yes, I am from Ohio, but it doesn't mean I condone the actions of those men who hurt your family.”

  “But you supported those men. You organized rallies to raise money for the Union’s war efforts. You sent care packages to the front lines. You did everything you could to help those Union soldiers because your fiancé, or your brother, or your uncle was one of those soldiers. I know, because our women did the same, my wife did all she could to help. The only difference was that our generals didn’t make a practice of kicking a man when he was down. We never tore apart the lives of the civilians we encountered as we marched through conquered lands. We didn’t burn everything to the ground so they would stay down. We knew that the losses on the battlefield were enough.”

  “I don’t understand why you're angry. Are you mad that I helped in the war effort? Is it that Ohio didn’t suffer as much as your state had? Are you upset I don’t know what actions the soldiers on either side took on or off the battlefield? Or are you angry because your wife suffered, and when you see me, I remind you of that?”

  “Why would you remind me of that?”

  “You don’t think I know.” She had spoken so softly, he’d nearly missed it. “Leland has shown me her photo. I know that all I am to you is a carbon copy of a woman you lost.”

  If only that were true. If that was all she was it would be simple to see her go. He had loved Mildred. She had been his best friend since childhood. But with Lilian, there was a passion. It was an entirely different type of love but was just as strong.

  “You don't remind me at all of Mildred. Maybe when we first met you did, but you are impulsive, childish, lively. You… you are nothing like her. I don't see her when I look at you. I only see the differenc
es. Your eyes have more green in them, you have laugh lines she never had, and you… you’re going to marry a politician who wants to change the laws and to punish us for a war we lost. Because we haven't been punished enough. He has publicly talked about making the South pay for the war debt. He advocates taking our land and redistributing it.”

  “Why are you blaming me? I’ve never had any say in those things. I don’t even know what policies he supports.”

  “How can you marry someone when you don't even know what he stands for?”

  “Stop saying that. I’m not going to marry him. You’re wrong. If you overheard us on the bluff, you should know that. I was going to marry him, but I didn’t. I broke it off before you and I ever met. And I could never marry him now because I’m in love with you.”

  Was his mind playing tricks on him? Had he heard her correctly? Hunter staggered back a step and struggled to catch his breath. He didn’t know what to think. By her own admission, this woman had agreed to marry a man she hardly knew only to change her mind. She obviously did not know her own heart, and that spelled misery for the next fool dumb enough to fall into her web. If he could help it, that fool would not be him. He needed to be alone. He needed time to himself.

  “You were able to become that close to a man who is on the path to becoming a national figure, and you openly admit your complete ignorance and apathy on national issues? And that is supposed to recommend you to me?”

  “Why should this matter? Why should either of us care what happens in Washington? We are a world away.”

  Guilt stabbed Hunter in the gut. He was a world away because he had been lucky enough to survive. Everyone he cared about would stay buried on the battlefields until the Lord came for them.

  “That is just what all those men who died thought. You don't understand me, and you never will. I was a fool to think otherwise. I was a fool to expose myself to something that could only lead to pain. I…I think you should go.”